Words of Jealousy
by LyLacLuva
Summary: Most AWTR diary fanfiction are of Landon or Jamie. But what about the other characters? Ever wonder what some of them are feeling too? Now you don't when you read Belinda's diary of her thoughts and feelings throughout the movie. A diary fic. Olivia
1. Senior Year

Title: Words of Jealousy  
  
Summary: Most AWTR diary fanfiction are of Landon or Jamie. But what about the other characters? Ever wonder what some of them are feeling too? Now you don't when you read Belinda's diary of her thoughts and feelings throughout the movie. A diary fic.  
  
Author: LyLacLuva  
  
Main characters: Belinda, Landon, Jamie  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or story. I own really nothing but the added ideas.  
  
Authors Note: Hi, guys! This is my third fic I've worked on. My second one is Somewhere Out There, and the first got banned for some reason. So this fic is basically Belinda's diary through the point when Landon Jamie started getting together. I'm also gonna add some stuff to it, that didn't really happen in the movie, ok? Got it? I'll say it again: I'm gonna add some stuff that didn't really happen in the movie. I don't want anybody reading my fic and thinking, "That's funny. I didn't notice that in the movie. Lemme go watch it again." Uh-uh. Ok, well, here's My fic, Words of Jealousy. Please submit a review. Thanks and enjoy! Olivia  
  
________________________________________  
  
Entry 1: Senior Year  
  
Dear Diary,  
  
Senior year starts tomorrow. I'm so excited! I'm especially excited about this year mainly because of Landon. I really, really think he's gonna want me back this year. I saw the way he kept on looking at me all the time the last few days of school. I just can't wait until he asks me out again so we can get closer.  
  
I met up with the gang yesterday and Dean told us that some freakin' little guy wants to do the initiation. I gotta meet up with them 10 PM tomorrow night just so the guy can jump. Think I forgot his name. Clyde or Kyle, or something. Well he actually wants to jump off into the water at the cement factory. Can you believe that? He's so stupid.  
  
I still remember when I did it. Man, it hurt like shit. I remember stepping out of the water with my teeth chattering and dripping wet. Everyone was laughing and cheering for some idiotic reason. What I don't get is why Dean is the only who hasn't done the initiation. For some reason, he just seemed to worm his way into the group, no jumping included. The rest of us all did it. Dean can be a real pain sometimes. I really don't know what Tracie sees in him. They're always fighting and arguing with each other, so I guess she doesn't see much either.  
  
But with Landon it's a whole different story. Not only is he extremely good looking but he can really crack a joke. The only problem is that he seems kind of, I dunno, DULL. That's completely unlike Eric. Eric, he's really loud. And he can dance which really turns me on. And Landon . . . well, I've never seen him dance. You'd think we danced a little, 'cause I've seen him for the longest time. But I haven't. He should take some dancing lessons from Eric. Well, whether he's a great dancer or can't dance shit, I still love him. I'll always love Landon. No matter what.  
  
-Belinda  
  
---Authors Note--- What did you guy think? I know it was short, but please submit a review and tell me! Thanx, Olivia 


	2. The Initiation

Entry 2- The initiation  
  
Dear Diary,  
  
I just got back from the police station. It was just really chaotic. I wasn't in a good mood earlier to begin with because I wanted to stay at the dance. It wasn't fair that the gang made me go to the stupid cement factory, but they pulled me away just when they were playing some good songs for once. So they dragged me outta there and kept saying that I was a part of the gang and had to be there. Finally I let them tug me out to Walker's car. I got in a bad mood then, and kept my mouth shut the ride there. I don't really like talking to SOMEONE. All he does is joke about Landon to make me mad. He's a real asshole.  
  
When we got to the factory, the little scamp wasn't even there yet! I think I forgot his name. It's Clyde or Kyle or something like that. So we all just chilled for a while. I was sure to be a little EXTRA sweet on Landon. He's sure to want me back in no time at all, right? When he asked for a beer I offered him one. What the hell is wrong with that boy, cause he didn't take it. Maybe it was me, or it could've been the fact that it wasn't cold. I don't think he likes his beer warm. Then again, I don't really know. After he passed up the beer, Eric started to annoy me again. By that time the kid still wasn't there so Dean, with his big ass mouth, started bragging about how he thought of this idea. Then I guess Tracie was thinking like me cause she started dissin' some of the guys, calling them animals. Dean was making me so pissed off, making me leave the dance and now bragging like we all actually CARE, that I began raving about how they made me leave the dance. And Dean told me to go back to the dance by myself. The idiot actually thought I wanted to go back to the dance with HIM. Like I would even want to be SEEN with him at a public place, not to mention DANCING with him. I'd rather dance with Eric. Still, Landon passed up, like I thought, since I have NEVER seen him dance. I guess Eric was reading my mind earlier cause then he jumped down from the hood of the car. And when I told him to put his freak away, I actually MEANT it. Really.  
  
By then, the kid FINALLY showed up in his grandpa's truck. Well, maybe it wasn't his grandfather's truck, but I assumed so cause it had a bumper that said WE'RE OLD AND WE'RE GOLD. Poor kid. Naturally I said hi. I didn't want to be cruel or anything, even though I knew the poor kid would suffer from the fall like crap. So the guys made fun of his car, his shirt and everything first as usual. And as if Dean hadn't pissed me enough, he started pestering the kid again about being late and all. He couldn't even show the poor kid some mercy when he knew he'd have to jump into some freezing cold water. At least the water was warmer when I had to jump. It was around summer time then. So when Dean finished his lecture, we all headed down to watch the kid jump. I gotta admit when I saw Tracie get a ride on Dean's back, it made me jealous. Why couldn't Landon do that to me? I'm getting a feeling he's lost his zest, ya know what I mean? But zest or none, I still love him.  
  
Well, when we all got down to the water, Landon started shedding his clothes. He looked so hot in those boxers! Ok, I'm getting off-track. Anyway, Dean started talking to the kid again. And he stripped down to underwear (the kid, not Dean. I would just die from horror if Dean did). When Landon and the kid were climbing up the ladder, I admit I was a little scared that someone would suddenly run over and bust us. That's happened before when Eric jumped. I wasn't there, though. I wasn't initiated yet. But I heard that he ran away before the cops got him.  
  
Anyway, once Landon and the kid got to the top, I saw them look at the water. Then I saw Landon count off and lean forward like he were gonna jump. I gotta confess it was pretty cool when the kid jumped off. I wish everyone could've seen the way his arms and legs wriggled around when he was falling. He looked like a fucked up, four-armed falling octopus. And his shout! It was like he was trying to yodel but yawning at the same time. It was great for a while until we saw his body float back up to the surface. I could swear, I have never been so freaked out in my life. To think he might've DIED because of us five. Well his body was just there in the water and everyone started running around and shouting. Dean seems to always be pissed off at something, so he was just throwing his arms up, walking around and cursing. I don't remember what I was doing but I know I called Landon's name. So he dived in the water. I was so scared for him and I felt sorry for him too. I mean, not only did he have to jump in the same water for his initiation, but he had to go in AGAIN. So then Eric was running around trying to get the kid to the surface. And it was like suddenly out of nowhere, this security guard ran up and Walker saw us all down there and shouted at us. At that, Dean and Tracie ran off to his car. I wanted to stay to help Landon, but was dragging me out to the car and shouting, "Come on, Belinda!" He is so annoying. I could've stayed to help Landon!  
  
But I ran to his car anyway, jumped in and didn't even close the door before he sped off. He drove nonstop for the longest time until we were back in our small town. Then Walker asked if I wanted him to take me home. I was gonna say yes, but I decided to go wait at Landon's house instead. I don't really know why. I guess I just wanted to see him, make sure he was okay. So Walker took me there, and I sat on the front steps for the longest time. After I'd been there for about an hour and a half, I assumed Landon was at Eric's house chillin. So I walked down there, which is only a couple houses away and knocked on the door. Eric opened it with a beer in his hand. I stood just outside the door when he asked me what the hell I was doing there. And I told him I was looking for Landon. He told me he didn't have a flying crap where he was. So this conversation went on a little longer when the phone rang. Eric walked inside and got the phone. I could hear his conversation, which had a lot of cursing and shouts and laughs. When Eric came back out he had his keys in his hand and jacket on. When I asked him where he was going, he just walked straight past me into his car. So I poked my head through his window and asked where he was going again. Hey, I just wanted to know if it had anything to do with Landon. And he told me he was gonna go pick up Landon. He didn't tell me from where, but I jumped into the car anyway.  
  
The car ride seemed like hours even though it was only about 20 minutes. I tried to ask Eric where we were going but for some reason he must've been in a bad mood. After he stopped driving I scrambled out of car and saw that we were at the downtown police station. I was like, what the hell are we doing here? Then I realized . . . Landon went to jail. At first I wanted to burst out laughing. I mean, who would've thought someone would go to jail just because of this initiation? That's NEVER happened before in our gang. So we went to the desk and found Landon inside. He was real grumpy and he didn't even greet me or Eric. The guys just did their stupid little handshake and jumped inside the car. Landon didn't talk on the trip at all except when he said, "Thanks," when Eric dropped him off. When we dropped him off at his house, we watched him climb up a tree to his bedroom window and climb in. We were just about to pull away when we heard some shouting. Of course, it was Landon's mom, who was, of course, waiting in his bedroom. Just before Landon's mom could stick her head out the window Landon climbed through, Eric sped out of his house's site. Then reluctantly, he drove to my street and dropped me off at the corner. From there, I had to walk down my street to my house and here I am. I'm way too tired to go out and do anything else. Damn, it was one hell of a night.  
  
Belinda  
  
---Authors Note--- What did you think? It probably seemed long compared to the first entry. And I made up everything that happened from when Belinda ran out to Walker's car. Please review! Thanks, Olivia 


	3. Stares

Entry 3- Stares  
  
Dear Diary,  
  
Today was basically really boring. Since Clay (I finally found out his name. Major accomplishment, huh?) got hurt in the initiation, and everybody knows about it, there was a special gathering at the downtown Baptist church. My parents made me go, cause they somehow found out that I was down at the cement factory too. So I went down there to the church, sat by myself, and I spotted Landon with his mother sitting near the front. Then Reverend Sullivan gave his boring speech about being thankful and praying or something like that. I wasn't really paying attention. Who does? I was too busy gazing at Landon. Well, then the choir sang their hymn. And Jamie Sullivan had her own little solo. That, of course, awed everyone with her voice.  
  
Yeah, Jamie's the Reverend's daughter (you can tell by the last name). Can you believe that? Being the Reverend's DAUGHTER. That's like one the worst things you could be in high school. I guess that's one of the reasons that she's constantly teased and ridiculed at school. Not to mention that she dresses like my great-grandmother, and carries around her Bible everywhere she goes. She's a senior like me. She barely talks to anybody but a few people and the teachers, and she gets good grades all year long. She probably has about 120 community service hours and she volunteers at the orphanage, pet shelter, and at our sister school. Sometimes I wonder what the hell is wrong with her. I mean, no normal teen would act like that, right? I guess that wouldn't make her a normal teen. Of course everybody in school has already realizes that. It's kind of hard to miss, the way she acts and all.  
  
But I'm getting off track. Anyway, while the choir was singing Lighthouse, I couldn't help but notice that Jamie was staring right at Landon! Can you believe that? I mean, what the hell is a reject like that doing staring at MY man? She probably thinks she actually has a chance with him! Ha! And the worst part is that Landon was actually STARING BACK! I was thinking, what the hell is going on? Is there something I should know about here? Then I realized Landon was simply staring at Jamie to think up some good pranks to pull on her. Yeah, that was it. Um, I hope.  
  
Belinda  
  
---Authors Note--- This entry was short and boring! Sorry! I'll try to make the next one longer and little more exciting. Thanks to everyone who submitted a review! Please R/R. Thanks, Olivia  
  
By they way, who gave me a review and signed their name as ME? Just wondering. That was pretty weird. Thanks. 


	4. A Big Ugly Stain

Entry 4- A big ugly stain

Dear Diary,

Today was a regular day at school, nothing new, same old. Kind of.

I drove myself to school and went to join the gang on the schoolyard. Landon had gotten a crutch and a bandage, I guess he had gone to the hospital after his mother had caught him climbing through the window. So, we all just chilled before classes started. Then Tracie spoke up, "Damn, that Jamie Sullivan sure got style." And when I said that she wore that dress in the fourth grade, I wasn't lying. It's like she's had that dress, but the size just got bigger. I've known Jamie since the second grade and ever since then, she's never had a very big flair for fashion. As a matter of fact, she doesn't have an eye for fashion at all. It always looks like whatever she's wearing should be some kind of slipcover for couches at the senior citizen home.

When Jamie got closer, I couldn't help but say to her, "Nice sweater." And guess what she said back. She said thank you. She said THANK YOU like I actually thought her sweater was cool. Jamie can be really clueless sometimes, even if she gets top grades and has the greatest chance of ending up valedictorian. But it's not like any of that matters when it comes to social skills, something she clearly needs to work on.

So when the bell rang, the gang slowly headed inside. Landon had to go to Mr. K's (Principal Kelly) office, so the rest of the gang and I waited outside of the office, skipping the first part of class. When Landon cam back out of the office, he had this dull look swept across his face. Then he told us his punishments, and after I heard him, I couldn't help feeling sorry for him. I mean, he had to help clean up the school, tutor stupid kids at our sister school AND be in the spring play. Being seen cleaning up the school is just about one of the lowest that you can get. And tutoring? As if spending time with moronic kids isn't bad enough, he has to do it on SATURDAYS.

Saturday is really the only day you can sleep the whole day and not get bothered for it. On the weekdays there's school, which you can always skip, but you get in trouble for it. On Sundays, everyone's practically is required to go to church in our small town. If you don't, everyone knows about it and all the adults start treating like some kind of sinner. It's crazy, I know.

But back to Landon. For his final punishment, he has to be in the Drama Club's musical. The only people who really go to watch the play is old ladies, and the parents and friends of the actors. Usually the plays aren't really terrible. I went to go watch it one year and it wasn't really that bad. Don't ask me why the hell I went to go see it. I was still a freshman and I had no idea that the plays had a bad rep.

This probably meant this would give Landon a big ugly stain in his rep, being in the play, tutoring, and being custodian. Yup, a stain bad as hell.

So the school day ended fast, since we skipped most of our classes. I, of course, went to science, though. I can't help liking that class. You get to cut open rats and chop up earthworms (and you can pretend one of those earthworms is Jamie Sullivan. Haha I know that was mean, sorry). Anyway, I stayed after school and just hung out for a while. I got a ride with Landon afterwards and when he dropped me off, I offered him to come inside. It was just part of my plan to get him back to me. I guess my plan isn't working very well, 'cause he told me that nothing's changed and that it was OVER. Ha. Whatever.

Belinda

---Authors Note---

Arghh! My chapters are so DULL! The entries are really boring at first, but they get better later on in the story. Please R/R. Thanks, Olivia


	5. Confused

Entry 5- Confused

Dear Diary,

Thank good it's Saturday! Well, today I wasn't in the mood to do a lot. Basically I just wanted to chill and do nothing. And I figured I could at least chill with Landon. So I went over to his house and rung the doorbell. His mom opened the door and when I asked if I could talk to Landon, she told me he was at tutoring. I thought: Of course he's at tutoring, what the hell is wrong with me? Yeah, you could tell I felt stupid. I knew that.

So I drove myself to Tracie's house. Tracie was getting ready to walk to Dean's house to go to the downtown burger place. She asked me if I wanted to go, and I had nothing better to do, so I didn't pass. We both walked down the street to Dean's place and saw that he stupidly left his car doors unlocked. So we hoped in and honked the horn loudly. Dean soon looked confusingly out of his bedroom window. And Tracie shouted for him to get his sleepy ass down there to drive us downtown. He rubbed his eyes, clearly from just waking up, and disappeared into his house. He came out soon, keys in one hand and a few beers in the other. He climbed in, gave Tracie a peck and started the car.

We sped to the burger place, not caring that Dean was practically driving half-asleep. When we got there, we sat on the hood drinking milkshakes and eating burgers. Not long after, Eric showed up. He joined us on the hood and ate the remains of my burger, saying that he couldn't even afford half burger after losing a lot of cash playing pool at the other restaurant.

Well, after a while Dean and Tracie went back to Dean's place, and after a few swigs, Eric went back to his house to see if he could get some more cash from his mother. I asked Eric to drive me to my neighborhood, though. The walk's too long from downtown to my place. So he dropped me off and I started walking to my house, slowly, thinking about ways to get Landon, when I heard a bus drive up behind me. It stopped right beside me in the street to drop off a student about my age. When the bus stopped, I looked inside, and you'll never guess what I saw.

It was Landon and Jamie, only they were sitting TOGETHER! In the same seat! And they were talking. Immediately, I assumed Landon was dissin Jamie, but she didn't look at all offended. And the scary part was that it looked like Landon was smiling! And Jamie was smiling back. I stared at them talking for a while until the bus pulled away. Then I realized the student the bus dropped was Denise, a girl in my class. She's okay, I guess. And she told me that I looked like I saw my worst nightmare. My reply was, "In a way, I did." Then I strolled away, leaving Denise looking bewildered, even though I knew I was more confused than she was.

Belinda

---Author's Note---

Some of you are probably wondering about which part looked like Landon was smiling at Jamie on the bus. Well in a way he sorta did. When he said, "You sit at lunch table seven." Well, please R/R. Thanks, Olivia


	6. The Weirdest Thing

Entry 6- The weirdest thing

Dear Diary,

I'm really questioning if there's something going on between Landon and Jamie. First, I caught them staring at each other at church, and then I spotted them sitting on the bus together the other day.

But today, I noticed something really weird. The weirdest thing EVER.

It was after school, and I was, once again, hanging out at the burger place downtown with Eric, Walker, Tracie, and Dean. Well, I was just stepping outside of the building with a few burgers in my hand when I spotted Jamie's ugly old car. At first, I thought nothing of it. I even considered throwing a burger at her windshield. But then I saw Landon IN HER CAR. I saw him look out of the window smiling and then he suddenly frowned and ducked his head. I watched the car go a little further down the street when I saw Landon's head pop back up again.

What the heck was that about? Is there some kind of RELATHIONSHIP between them I should know about? And who knew where they were going? They could've been driving over to some snazzy restaurant on a date or to Landon's house for some privacy!

Well, this was just driving me crazy! It's almost like Landon could actually be friends with Jamie. No, no, that can't be true. I'm losing my mind. That's probably what it looked like when I headed back to Eric's car with the burgers in my hand. Tracie told me that I looked like an animal. Is that her favorite word or something? She's always using it to insult people, when it's even insulting at all. And her sentence didn't even make any sense. And technically, I AM an animal cause people are mammals, right? Whatever.

Belinda

---Authors Note---

Urgh. I feel like this story is so dull and LIFELESS and nothing exciting ever goes on. Please review. Thanks, Olivia


	7. No More Belinda Carter

Entry 7- No more Belinda Carter

Dear Diary,

THAT DOES IT! Remember when I said that I think there's something going on between Landon and Jamie? Well, I don't think I could be more right! It's officially official now! Landon is having an affair with Jamie Sullivan! Damnn, I'm so crushed. All this time I thought I could make something of Landon and me. But now it's clear. He dumped me for the Virgin Mary! Who would ever think that he would take a complete reject over ME?

Well, here's how I know that Landon and Jamie are together.

I was just simply driving to my own house after school, right? And to get to my house, you have to pass through Jamie's neighborhood. So I was passing through, when I saw Eric's car in front of Jamie's house. So I was like, what the hell is Eric doing at HER house? But then I remembered that Landon has been borrowing his car ever since his Camaro got wrecked the night of the initiation.

Curiously, I looked out of my window and saw Landon ringing Jamie's doorbell. I slowed down my car for a little while to see what was going on, and then Jamie opened the door and flashed a smile at Landon. Then Landon went inside!

After that, I was so puzzled, I completely forgot I was driving, so I almost crashed into a mailman's truck. I got back on track in no time, though. When I got home, I couldn't stop thinking about Landon and Jamie. So, that night, I decided to go over to Landon's and get everything straight.

I drove myself to his house and saw him sitting on the porch by himself reading from a little blue paper book. He put it down when he saw me though. He said, "Hey." But I didn't even greet him back.

I decided to go on easy on him at first. So I simply asked Landon where he was after school. He told me he was at home all day since school let out. Ha! There goes Lie #1. Then I asked him if was anywhere near Livingston Hill Road (the road where Jamie lives) any time today. He said he hadn't gone near there. Lie #2. Next I asked if he had gone to visit someone at his or her house today. He denied. Lie #3. And then I spilled.

I shouted, "What the fuck were you doing at Jamie Sullivan's house?" At first he looked shocked, but then he gave a shaky little laugh and said, "Uh, what makes you think I was THERE?" He disgusted me. I told him he's a terrible liar. He continued to tell me that he was never at Jamie's. I was so mad at him for betraying me for that girl, and now lying, that I gave him a shove. Then he exclaimed, "Belinda, what the hell is your problem!"

And I retorted, "What 's my problem? WHAT'S MY PROBLEM? My problem is that after almost a year you're gonna suddenly turn your back on me to take some reject like Jamie!" He just looked at me puzzled and said, "What makes you think I would even go out with Jamie Sullivan?"

He was so stupid. He didn't know I'd seen him with Jamie all this time. So I said to him, "You just don't get it do you? I've SEEN you, Landon. I've seen you with Jamie on the bus, in her car, AND going into her house!" The fool didn't even respond, he was in such a state of shock.

He opened his mouth to say something but I interrupted, "What happened to us, Landon? What happened to growing up together? You told me you loved me!" That got his attention. He chuckled to himself and uttered, "Do you think I actually meant that?" He shook his head slightly and chuckled again. And that did it.

I gave him another shove and said, "That's for choosing the Virgin Mary over ME! Thanks a lot, Carter." Then I got into my car, slammed the door and sped away, purposely driving out of control. And that brings me here. I'm too depressed to go out tonight.

I'm so crushed. I for sure thought Landon and I would have a lifetime together. But it's all being taken away by one measly little girl. Before it used to always be 'Landon and Belinda'. But now it's 'Landon and Jamie'. That doesn't even sound right. I definitely thought the name I would go by years from now would be Belinda Carter. But Jamie Carter? That doesn't fit. Damn, I'm so torn. I wish Jamie would stop ruining my life and go to hell.

Belinda

---Authors Note---

Officially official – haha! I love that. Please read and review. Thanks for all that reviewed. Olivia


	8. In Her Dreams

Entry 8- In her dreams

Dear Diary,

I've been feeling so miserable lately. The whole thing about Landon and Jamie has really gotten to me. Of course I didn't tell anyone about my feelings. They would just think I'm jealous of Jamie.

But today Walker told me something that I would've been so much better off not hearing. The other day he told me was driving home late at night after school when he saw Landon following Jamie into the cemetery. And from his car, he told me he saw them going deeper into the cemetery. I, of course, freaked out at that. That just pained me even more. I decided no to tell Landon about it, though. And I made Walker swear not to tell him either. When he asked me why, I just told him to watch out if Landon says anything about it.

So later that morning we were all just hanging around in front of the lockers watching the people go by. But here comes the good part. Jamie actually walked up to Landon and asked him if she would see him after school. Landon told she would--- in her dreams.

I admit, that made me feel a little better—knowing that Jamie meant nothing to Landon in public. Of course I did take that opportunity to walk out to our next class arm in arm. Ya know, maybe Landon still is on the money after all. At least that's what I thought.

The past few days I haven't really been seeing Landon a lot. I guess that's just because he's been busy with that fuccking play. I think he's sorta using the play as an excuse to spend time with Jamie.

Belinda

---Authors Note---

this was bOring! My writing is lifeless. If you wanna read something more exciting please read Somewhere Out There, my other fic. It's completed and I think it's on page two, AWTR section. Please R/R. Thanks, Olivia


	9. Eyes of Anger

Entry 9- Eyes of Anger

Dear Diary,

GAWD! This is NOT happening! I can't believe this! I must be the unluckiest person in the whole fuckin world! And it's all because of the pathetic excuse for a girl! I HATE JAMIE SULLIVAN! What the fcuk is wrong with her? WHY does she have to go around in her little quiet way, and then all of a sudden steal my man? Tonight is probably the worst night of my entire life! Here's what happened:

Tonight was the opening night of that play Landon's been so busy with. So everything was pretty normal by the time it started. The whole gang went, to see Landon act. I had to sit between these two old people, 'cause it was already packed when I got there. So when the play started it wasn't that bad. Nothing unusual happened—yet.

More to the end of the play, Eric started snoring—LOUD. Really loud. Practically the whole audience could hear him. I guess that sort of pissed me off already. Anyway, I was just taking a whole lot of pictures of the scenes. Then Jamie came out. When she pulled of her cloak, I noticed the audience had become completely silent. Even Eric had woken up. I mean, I was even surprised by the way Jamie looked. I always thought she would never have the guts to wear a low neck sleeveless in front of the entire audience. Well, she did. And it blew everybody away. Especially Landon.

His face, it was so obvious. He apparently looked surprised to see Jamie like that. He was even stuttering! Clearly, he was real nervous around her. And from watching a few of his rehearsals, I could easily tell he forgot some of his lines. So when he said to her, "You're beautiful.", I knew that was real. That line didn't appear anywhere in the script unless they changed it at last second. I know he actually MEANT it. I wouldn't be surprised if someone caught me breathing hard like a dragon.

And just when, I thought I'd seen the worst, Jamie sings her song and sends Landon into some kind of . . . trance. Like he wouldn't take his eyes off of her nearer to the end of the song. The look on his face was just so clear that he likes her. And while he was giving that face, I couldn't help but wonder, 'Why didn't he ever use that face on ME?'. The more I thought about this things the more I got mad.

But here's the worst part. Just as Jamie finished her song and sat back down at the table, Landon . . . he . . . shitt! It hurts so much I can't even write it! Ok, here goes. Landon leaned across the table and KISSED HER! He really, truly, actually freakin kissed her in front of the entire audience! Sorry if my handwriting's getting a little shaky, but it just hurts so much, I can't control myself! I feel like pulling all of my hair out, throwing it all Jamie , saying, "HERE! HERE'S WHAT YOU EFFIN' DID TO ME!"

When Landon and Jamie finished up their . . . K-I-S-S, the curtain went down. That nearly drove me insane. I mean, who knew what was going on behind that curtain? I didn't want to think about it so I ran down the steps, with tears streaming down my face and flew out of the community center as fast as I could—before Eric caught me by the shoulders and stopped me. He said, "Belinda, what's wrong?" And all I could say was, "It hurts, it hurts so much . . ." then while he still held my shoulders, he questioned, "What hurts?" as I struggled, I replied, "The kiss, it . . . it was real, Eric." And then he let me go, knowing. Then I ran away to my car and sped home, with anger in my eyes.

Belinda

---Authors Note---

O0o0o0…Belinda's MAD. Tell me what you guys think about this one. Thanks, Olivia


	10. Virgin Mary?

Entry 10- Virgin Mary?

Dear Diary,

Today at school, I came up with the best idea ever. I'm still rattled up about the whole Landon/Jamie issue, so I decided it would be perfect.

Before I get into that, I have to say that yesterday I actually felt kinda better about the L/J thing. Just yesterday, in study hall, I saw Landon walk right past Tracie and me. He didn't sit with us, nor did he even greet us! How rude. I watched him walk out of the library and straight to where Jamie was eating lunch. From our table, I could see them having a conversation. Tracie kept trying to get my attention to some chem. homework she needed help on but I paid no attention. So I kept my eyes fixed on Landon. Nothing happened for some time. Jamie was just talking and reading some book while Landon sat looking around. But then, I saw Jamie suddenly stand up, hurry out of the cafeteria, past the library and out the front doors. Then Landon followed, running. I stood up from my chair, nearly knocking over my books, and hurried to a window. I stared outside as I watched Jamie run away from Landon. I was thinking, 'Ha! Looks like she finally got her heart broken.' But then I saw Landon grab her by the shoulders and I guess he said something really mean, because then, Jamie got into her car and left Landon standing by himself on the sidewalk.

But back to today at school. In the morning before I went to school, I stopped by the photo shop to pick the pictures from the play. I didn't get a chance to look at them until later in the afternoon since I was so busy the whole morning. So before lunch, I was leafing through them with Eric and Walker showed up. The two were talking about how 'hot' Jamie looked that night. That, of course, got me boiling. It was like Jamie had somehow brainwashed every boy with her big breakthrough. That's when I came up with . . . ta-da! . . . the IDEA.

First, we went to this website that the guys really seemed to like to get a "hot girls" photo. It took about five minutes just to get them to stop staring and make the fliers already. Finally, we copied one of pictures. After that, we scanned one of the photos of Jamie onto the computer. It's a good thing Eric is good with computers, or else I wouldn't have been able to make the fliers. He opened up PS and started cropping Jamie's face. Then he pasted it onto the body with a bikini. And for a touch, we added the words VIRGIN MARY?

We printed one out, and then sneaked into the faculty room (students aren't allowed, unless they're sent). We made about 60 copies to pass out to everybody. It wasn't enough copies for everyone, but we ran out of paper. So I gave a bunch to Tracie, a bunch to Walker, and they stood on the front steps passing them out to everyone that walked by.

I kept my eyes peeled for Jamie the entire afternoon. I desperately wanted to see her face when she saw the flier. I didn't see her until lunchtime, so I ran up to her and did some sucking up. Then I invited to eat lunch with me. That was just my little way of getting her to see the flier in front of an audience. I wanted to be sure everyone saw the look of terror on her face. So I picked up one of the fliers from a table and pretended I never saw the flier before. I showed to Jamie and said, "Nice bod."

The LOOK on her face was priceless! She looked like she had lost her daddy, but the only thing she had lost was the itty-bit of popularity she had left. So everybody in the lunchroom was just laughing at her while she standing there—and then Landon showed up. Landon in his shining armor. He walked in just as Jamie was running out. He caught her in his arms (which really annoyed me) and said that it wasn't her. Then he snatched the flier I was holding out of hands, nearly giving me a huge paper cut. He walked straight to Dean and just glared at him. Then Dean said, pointing at Jamie "Hey no worder you been keeping her locked up man. I had no idea this was underneath all that."


End file.
